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some sign of lifean outside light, the kitchen lamp, even the green glow of the digital clock on the micro. But this was more than the absence of a light. In the headlights the windows seemed to gape like sightless eyes, stripped of curtains and blinds. And within, naked walls. The place looked like it had died.
Calvin did not drive around back but stopped at the front wall. He got out, still not clear why they were here.
There was no sound but the static charge of crickets. The light of a full moon white-washed the front lawn.
Terry headed up the walk with a kind of slow deliberation. She stopped once to take in the dead dogwood. In the cold moonlight it looked like an X-ray.
"Terry, let's not torture ourselves." He took her arm. "Come on, let's go"
But she pulled away and dug into her pockets for the key. She looked driven. Obsessed.
She unlocked the front door and he followed her through.
It was as if he had entered a vacuum. The emptiness sucked his breath. Nothing stirred. Nothing broke the blankness.
Calvin made a move to turn on the dining room chandelierthe only remaining fixturebut Terry stopped him. The moonlight seepage would guide her.
She moved through the downstairs rooms with her arms wrapped tightly to her chest. The only sound was of their feet across the oak floorboards.
In the family room Calvin said, "Terry, why are we here? What's the point?"
Her eyes were wide. "I don't know . . ." And there was nothing in her face to say she did.
He followed her upstairs, trying to fight back the memories . . . Matty diapered and climbing the stairs for the first time, Matty bounding down on Christmas morning, his feet stuffed in Kermitthe-Frog slippers, Matty sitting on the bottom step trying to teach Daisy to talk . . .
At the top Terry turned into his room. Calvin again caught her arm. "Don't do this to yourself."
Again she pulled away, not with anger but an iron determination.
The room was like a vacant cube. All the gaudy monsters had

 
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